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When I was pregnant with Miss S, everyone thought we were absolutely crazy. To be honest, I totally see where they’re coming from. I now have four tiny humans, and I am severely outnumbered! Not to mention, one of my friends pointed out that in the future I will have kids that are 13, 15, 17, and 18.

What were we thinking?? Now of course, there are plenty of struggles with having a large family, but today I’m sharing the very hardest part about having four kids. Trust me, it’s not what I expected.

So what is the absolute hardest part about having four kids? Getting in the car. Seriously. For those who don’t believe me, I get it. Isn’t working with four little ones the hardest? Or homeschooling the oldest while the others need me too? Or even trying to get them all to sleep at the same time?

Absolutely not.

I’m going to be honest, getting in the car is flipping terrible, and I feel like all moms with more than three children should have a personal assistant to get kids in and out of the car for her every time she has to go anywhere. Here’s what getting my four tiny humans, aged 6, 4, 2, and 2 months into the car looks like on the average day.

The Hardest Part About Having Four Kids is Getting in the Car

The Hardest Part About Having Four Kids!

Step One: Getting Ready

Of course this step starts at least an hour before we have to actually get in the car, if not two hours. First I have to feed Miss S because if I don’t she will absolutely be starving and screaming in the car. I also need to make sure the older kids get dressed in real clothes.

A-Man decides that he can only survive if he stays in jammies the entire day, so we argue for five minutes before I give in. Baby M believes he needs to have socks, pants, and a shirt on over his footie pajamas.

Again, a toddler wins the argument. Mr. C takes roughly 247 minutes tying his shoes, only to realize they’re on the wrong feet.

Now, everyone is somewhat dressed, and I have to get my diaper bag ready. Luckily, I have four kids so I know all you really need is diapers, wipes, snacks, and burp rags.

Once I get those together, Miss S is starving again. So I sit down to nurse her again, but this time there’s three boys ready to go out the door pulling at me and screaming “GO. GO CAR. MAMA. GO CAR TIME. GO. DOOR. GO DOOR CAR. PLEASE?”

Finally, Miss S is done and I get her all situated in the ring sling that is oh so necessary for step two. We’re almost out the door, then Baby M needs a diaper change and A-Man needs a snack and Mr. C’s shoes are untied. Again.

Then once that is all handled, Miss S spits up all over my shirt. I half wipe it in a burp rag and begin the trek towards the minivan.

Step Two: The Journey

Paint the scene: I have Miss S in a ringsling, Baby M on the opposite hip, my keys in my hands, and Mr. C and A-Man holding each others’ hands as I’m scrambling to try and lock the door while unlocking the van. There’s also a diaper bag thrown in there somewhere.

I finally get the door locked and push the button to open the van’s doors (mamas, if you don’t have this button you need it), and we start the journey off the porch.

Miss S is hysterical because she spit up so naturally, her belly is completely empty now, and we live in Washington so of course it’s raining on her.

Baby M is thrashing around because he wants to walk, but he can’t do the stairs by himself. Also, he’s the size of the average one-year-old, so I can’t bend low enough to hold his hand while carrying everything else.

We get half way down the stairs and A-Man realizes that he forgot his toy that he ABSOLUTELY needed. I have a split second to decide if I’d rather spend the energy to go back up, unlock the door, and find the toy, or face the meltdown that he will inevitably have if we don’t get his toy.

Usually, the thought of going back up the stairs is too much for me, so we spend 15 to 20 minutes handling the meltdown before we actually make it to the car. Occasionally, Mr. C also falls because his shoes are untied again.

The Hardest Part About Having Four Kids!

Step Three: The Car

We finally make it to the minivan, and Mr. C and A-Man climb in by themselves (hallelujah!). I plop Mr. C in his seat and go around the van to Miss S’s seat. I take her out of the ringsling and put her in her seat. I wrangle her awkward newborn body into the straps and make sure she’s buckled in safely. While this is happening, Mr. C is buckling A-Man into his seat.

Then I come back around to Baby M’s side of the van to get him buckled. I also have to give him his cup roughly three times because he throws it constantly. And I try to get his crazy toddler self into his buckles while he’s screaming “CAA. CAA. MAMA CAA.” (caa is cracker, for those of you who don’t speak speech-delayed toddler.)

I finally get him buckled and get him his “CAA”, and I give some to A-Man as well because of course Baby M can’t have anything that A-Man doesn’t have.

Then I realize that Mr. C buckled A-Man’s seat all twisted, so I completely re-do it while giving a few crackers to Mr. C.

Finally, all of my little ones are buckled and I make my way to my seat. I sit down (and breathe) and then realize that my keys are in the back seat by Miss S’s car seat.

I finally have all of my kids buckled safely in their seats. I have my keys and my phone. All of the boys have ample supplies of crackers. I turn on the car and take off towards my destination. Typically 15 minutes late and listening to Idina Menzel belting “Let it Go”. Still.

Needless to say, I’ve become quite a homebody since having Miss S! I was prepared for life to get harder when we became a family of six, but I had no idea what the hardest part of having four kids would be. So other mamas, what do you think the hardest part of having a large family is?

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About Kaylene

Kaylene George is an autistic self-advocate, author, and mother of five, including one autistic child. She realized her own autism as an adult shortly after her son received his initial diagnosis. Suddenly the parts of her that seemed so “weird” to society had an answer. Since then, Kaylene has passionately shared about her experiences with autism from both sides of the great divide between parents and autistic self-advocates on AutisticMama.com.