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If there’s one thing that all of my clients have in common, it’s the fact that they desperately want to accommodate their Autistic child.

“I just wish I could help them feel comfortable”

“I can’t seem to help him stay regulated”

“She’s so frustrated that we don’t understand what she needs”

Parent-advocates want to help accommodate their Autistic child to help them stay regulated day to day.

But it can be super complicated.

There are a million and four tools, strategies, and recommendations for “accommodating Autistic children”, but it’s more important that you figure out how to accommodate your unique Autistic child.

That’s why I’m sharing 3 specific strategies to accommodate YOUR Autistic child.

3 Strategies to Accommodate Your Autistic Child

Now before I even dive in, I know that one of the biggest fears that come up around accommodation is: Am I accommodating or coddling?

But the truth is, if you focus on these three steps, you will truly be accommodating your Autistic child.

With these steps to accommodate, you’ll be focused on meeting your child’s needs and helping them regulate.

Once you’ve nailed these strategies, you’ll be ready to move forward to things like navigating boundaries or independence and self-advocacy.

#1 Identify & Regulate Sensory Needs

The first step to accommodate your Autistic child is to identify and regulate their sensory needs.

Autistic children often struggle with sensory regulation, and that can lead to meltdowns, shutdowns, or outbursts.

But it isn’t as simple as googling “sensory tools for Autistic children”.

Because the reality is, all Autistics (and all humans in general) have different sensory preferences and needs, and those needs can change depending on so many different circumstances.

So instead of trying to throw a weighted blanket and a fidget at your kid and hoping it works, it’s important to take the time to identify your child’s unique sensory needs.

Doing that work and creating a plan to meet those needs regularly is the key to managing so many different behavior struggles.

#2 Reduce Unnecessary Demands

Once you’re meeting your child’s sensory needs on a regular basis, it’s time to start reducing unnecessary demands.

And to do that, you need to start with determining exactly what demands are necessary.

Since we’re focused on accommodating your Autistic child, I’m going to suggest you stick to the 3 most basic necessary demands:

  1. Safety
  2. Laws
  3. Consent

If you have a demand for your child that isn’t directly related to safety, laws, or respecting someone’s consent, we need to let it go.

Now, I have an entire module on this in Embracing Autism Accelerator, so I can’t possibly cover it all in one blog post, but here’s one quick tip:

Decide if you’re going to remove the demand entirely, negotiate the details around the demand, or if you’re going to delay the demand until you’re ready to layer in some more boundaries.

#3 Empower Autistic Communication

The third strategy to accommodate your Autistic child is empowering Autistic communication.

And, again, there are a lot of parts to this strategy.

But one of the most important is to understand the 5 types of Autistic communication and start to decode what your child is trying to communicate with you.

When you start to do that, you’re able to respond to that communication, which helps them feel heard and understood.

(Plus, it encourages them to continue communicating since what they’re currently doing is working!)

This is also when you can start to boost your child’s communication skills to help them reach goals and communicate in a way that more people can understand.

Empowering Autistic communication can also include helping your child translate neurotypical communication or navigate communication struggles like “rudeness” or only talking about one specific subject.

These 3 strategies are incredibly powerful, but you might be left thinking “okay, but how?? How do I actually regulate my child’s sensory needs, reduce unnecessary demands, and empower their Autistic communication??”

I teach all about how to accommodate your Autistic child (and how to balance those accommodations with real-life) in my Embracing Autism Accelerator Program.

Plus, when you apply for the Accelerator, you get access to an exclusive private training: 3 Steps to Become the Parent-Advocate Your Child Needs.

Image of a laptop showing the exclusive private training: 3 Crucial Steps to Become the Parent-Advocate Your Child Needs.

Click here to apply and get your invite to the private training!

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About Kaylene

Kaylene George is an autistic self-advocate, author, and mother of five, including one autistic child. She realized her own autism as an adult shortly after her son received his initial diagnosis. Suddenly the parts of her that seemed so “weird” to society had an answer. Since then, Kaylene has passionately shared about her experiences with autism from both sides of the great divide between parents and autistic self-advocates on AutisticMama.com.