Spread the word!

As I sit down to write this blog post, Miss S is napping. Mr. C and Cap’n M are playing “PJ Masks” and occasionally “kick high fiving” each other, which is the new way they’ve found to kick each other without getting in trouble for fighting, and A-Man is watching his favorite Tinkerbell movie. I know a lot of moms are loving the flexibility that blogging gives them, and they only blog when their kids are asleep or at school, but that just does not work for our family, and for a while, I felt really guilty about it. But the fact is, I blog while my kids are awake, and I don’t feel guilty.

I Blog While My Kids Are Awake, And I Don’t Feel Guilty

Let me be clear, I see nothing wrong with mamas that only work while their kids are sleeping. More power to them! I just want to share my side. The side that can sometimes be accused of being “addicted to my phone” or “ignoring my family”. Because neither of those things is really true. (Well, I might be sliiiiiightly addicted to my phone, but who isn’t these days?!)

I’m Our Primary Income Source

I used to blog primarily during nap and bedtimes, but since Chris quit his full-time job to join me working from home full time, I’m our primary income source. Our income is currently split between my VA work, this blog’s income, and LuLaRoe profits.

It was a lot easier to put blogging off until bedtime when I was trying to pay for my Starbucks habit. It’s a lot more difficult to do that when the blog pays our rent! The simple fact is, if I don’t get work done, we don’t make money.

I’m HERE, Even When I’m Blogging

One thing I want to tell all the mama’s out there hustling from home that feel guilty for working while their kids are awake is this: You. Are. Still. There. I come at this from a bit of a different angle than most “mom bloggers” because I worked full time while my oldest kiddos were little.

I spent years waking the kids up and dropping them off with my mother in law to get to work by 8 am, only to pick them up around 6 pm, feed them dinner and get them ready for bed. I lived for the weekends when I got to spend time with the boys, and it was really hard knowing that I missed out on so much time with them.

Now? I still work full-time (sometimes more than that… Don’t ask how many hours I’ve worked on my book that’s coming out!) but I am here. I’m present. When my kids say “mommy look at this!” I can look up from my blog post and see what they want to show me. I can set my laptop up in the dining room while the kids are getting their school work done and answer questions while I work.

It’s Important That My Kids Know I Work

When I worked the blog part time and tried to keep my entire work schedule to nap times and bed times, my kids had no idea that I had a job. There were more than a few comments about how “daddy had a real job” and mommy “plays on the computer”. While we explained that mommy worked too, it was hard for the kids to comprehend since they never saw me leave for work and they never saw me working.

Now? The kids know that mom has a job to do, and that job is important to our whole family. They know that when I tell them I need a little bit to focus and work, they know I’m not just “playing on the computer” but working hard to pay for the things our family needs.

My Kids Are Learning Independence

I had a sweet friend ask me the other day how I possibly kept my kids entertained and occupied all day. The truth? I just don’t. My kids have plenty of toys (way too many if you ask me) and enough books to start a small library. We don’t stress much about screen time, and my kids have enough siblings to have a new best friend pretty much every day of the week.

Because of all of this, the kids can pretty much keep themselves occupied when we need them to. Mr. C can do most of his homeschool lessons semi-independently. Even Miss S, who isn’t even two yet, can play for a while without specifically being “entertained”.

I am not an “activity” mom, so I can’t imagine how bored we would all be if my kids didn’t take the initiative and learn to play independently!

No One Would Ever Expect My Husband to Work During Nap and Bedtimes

I just have to throw this one in here because it really bothers me. I have several friends with husbands that own businesses or work from home. No one would ever expect those dads to only ever work during nap and bedtimes. Ever. No one is shocked to hear that dads don’t spend 100% of the time their kids are awake keeping them entertained and occupied. Why this expectation for moms?

I work while my kids are awake. I work while they’re asleep too. I’m working like crazy right now so that hopefully in a few years I can slow down and spend a bit less time working. But for now? This works for our family. Working while my kids are awake means that my kids are growing up with mom AND dad both home full time. We can jump up and go to the zoo on a random Thursday, or have a lazy jammie day watching movies on a Tuesday.

But in order to have that flexibility, it means that today, a Friday, I’m writing this post while my kids are awake. And yeah, I don’t feel guilty at all.

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About Kaylene

Kaylene George is an autistic self-advocate, author, and mother of five, including one autistic child. She realized her own autism as an adult shortly after her son received his initial diagnosis. Suddenly the parts of her that seemed so “weird” to society had an answer. Since then, Kaylene has passionately shared about her experiences with autism from both sides of the great divide between parents and autistic self-advocates on AutisticMama.com.